Change

09.02.2011

God’s been working in me.   I’ve always been sensitive to the needs of others but lately my heart feels like it is literally breaking when I think about:

  • Deaf mothers who can not hear the sweet sound of their children’s voices because they can not afford or simply do not have the resources needed to receive hearing aids.
  • Families who are sending their children to sleep hungry because their daily ration of food is gone- not to mention those who are in mourning over the loved ones they have lost to starvation.
  • Families who do not have clean water to drink.
  • Young women who have been sold into sex slavery in order to repay debts.  Debts that are usually a result of families just trying to get simple necessities such as food, a place to call home, water, etc.
  • Young men and women who labor day and night to earn a wage that equates to less than what our family refers to as “junk change”.
Just to name a few.  Suffering is not a new concept for me but the condition of my heart when I think about it, especially when I look into my own children’s eyes, totally is.   Please don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I didn’t care before but it’s more like I didn’t care enough.
“Everything in the world is about to be wrapped up, so take nothing for granted. Stay wide-awake in prayer. Most of all, love each other as if your life depended on it. Love makes up for practically anything. Be quick to give a meal to the hungry, a bed to the homeless—cheerfully. Be generous with the different things God gave you, passing them around so all get in on it: if words, let it be God’s words; if help, let it be God’s hearty help. That way, God’s bright presence will be evident in everything through Jesus, and he’ll get all the credit as the One mighty in everything—encores to the end of time. Oh, yes! ” –  1 Peter 4:10-11 (The Message)
Talk about conviction.  Sure I’ll hand a few dollars to someone in need and we’ve opened our home to many people in need throughout the years.  Compared to many people, our family would be considered generous.  But compare us to Jesus and we fall short.  My heart is truly awakened to the suffering that exists in this world. The reality is that most suffering could be completely eliminated if people like you and me actually took our “gifts”, our “blessings” and turned them into tools to bless others too.  For most people, the question is not “when will we care?” but rather “when will we care enough?”

If I am being honest, I do not know how the Lord will use our family to further His Kingdom.  But there are things that I do know.  I know that He is breaking our hearts for what breaks His.  I know that He has blessed us and with His help anything can be accomplished.  I know that when the time comes, our answer to His call will be “yes!”

Where Did the Time Go?

09.01.2011


As I sit down to write this, I’m thinking about time.  I’m thinking about how much I have to get done in the few hours left in the day.  I’m thinking about how little time we have and how fast time goes by – which leads me to thinking about my precious family.  My boys, who are equally my heart, my everything!  I could write about all the new and exciting things we’ve been going through, like all the cool things Evan does now and Caden’s first lost tooth, but all that will have to wait until next time.  Right now I am on a mission to lift up my first born, Caden (and yes, we call him our first born because he is.  You can read all about that here.)

Caden started VPK last week and he’s done amazingly well.  When I walked him to his classroom on that first day, I was more nervous than he was.  I leaned against the door frame, while he rushed over to his seat.  I stood there for a moment just waiting (and maybe hoping) for him to turn around and run back to me, to cling to my legs and ask me not to go.  In a way, I wanted him to need me like he once did. As I watched him engage in child conversation with his new friends, I could see all the wonderful things he’d grow up to be.  It was a beautiful, bittersweet moment.

Soon I accepted that he would be okay and with a last wave goodbye, I turned and started down the hallway.  A few seconds later I heard a sweet voice yell “Mama…”, followed by small but loud footsteps coming toward me. I turned around only to be met by a little boy clinging to my legs, hugging them as tight as he could.  He looked up at me and said, “I want YOU to pick me up after school is over.”   That moment was a gift from God – a sweet reminder that he’ll always need me, even if his needs change.

Our sweet Caden is growing up and even though he is still only four, we realize more than ever that these little boys we are raising will one day be men with families of their own (God willing).   Our actions today will help mold them into the men they’ll become.  Even the most insignificant things are building blocks to their morale structure.  So while time continues to fly by, my goal will be to stop and enjoy the small moments in life!